Thankful Thursday...Bravery & Sacrifice

What would life be like without the brave?

What if no one was willing to sacrifice for our freedom?

This Thursday I'm extremely thankful for the brave men and women of our Armed Forces. I'm thankful for the sacrifice of many so that we can be free, and so that those who aren't yet free can live in anticipation of it. I often wonder where we would be without men and women who are brave and sacrificial. I know we would be in a heap of trouble, that's for sure!

Three men in my family serve our country - my husband, my son and my son-in-law. All three will be deploying in the very near future. All three hold a very special place in my heart, and their bravery and sacrifice sometimes overwhelms me.

This 4th of July, I pray all Americans will think beyond the parties, parades, and pretty fireworks displays; that they will stop and pray for those in harm's way and thank God for their freedom.

Thank you to our brave Soldiers, Airmen, Sailors, Marines and Coast Guard! To the many in harm's way, and your families, know that many are praying for you as you bravely fight on foreign soil. Thank you for your bravery and sacrifice!

A few words...

I'm not even sure how to begin this post. It's been so long since I've written anything - or at least finished it. Several times I would begin to write, but the words just wouldn't flow so I gave up. Time is drawing near and my heart aches. We've spent as much time together as possible - another reason I fail to post much on my blog these days - but it doesn't seem like enough when I compare it to the time we will have to be apart.

Thank you to each of you who have written recently to tell me how I've ministered to you through my blog, or told me you are praying for me and my family. That has ministered to my heart! I have so many wonderful friends through this blog and I'm so very thankful for that. Hang with me through this time of few-and-far-between posts, or little communication via email or facebook. Each of you holds a special place in my heart and I cherish our friendship. Thank you for sticking with me and sharing how God is working in your life right now. I'm happy to say we have new chaplains who recently began their ministry, or have word they have been accepted, so I'm thrilled about that and celebrate with them! Praise the Lord!

Again, thank you, friends, for your love, encouragement and prayers. Soon enough I'll be back to writing more often and keeping in touch better. For now, it will continue to be few-and-far-between when I post as I minister to my husband and family as time draws near.

Discussions We All Hate

We don't want to think about it, much less talk about it, but death is something every Soldier and wife must talk about before the Soldier deploys. It's difficult, it hurts, it stings, it tears at the very core of your heart as you look into the eyes of the one you love and have to talk about the possibility of death - but it's important.

My husband and I have been having these conversations off and on some lately. Off and on because it's hard to do in one sitting. It's not easy, and it makes me want to vomit when I think about it, but I know it has to be discussed and certain things have to be set in place. When he tells me he loves me and doesn't want me to have to think about it later, if it were to happen, I can't argue with that. But, I do cry (which makes it even harder for him to discuss).

To get to the point - this morning I was wide awake at 5 a.m. (not by choice because it's Saturday, but because I'm used to it) and, as I was reading my bible, I came across this (it's long so prepare to stay engaged and read it all):

1 Corinthians 15: 42-55: So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body. So it is written: "The first man Adam became a living being"; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit. The spiritual did not come first, but the natural, and after that the spiritual. The first man was of the dust of the earth, the second man from heaven. As was the earthly man, so are those who are of the earth; and as is the man from heaven, so also are those who are of heaven. And just as we have borne the likeness of the earthly man, so shall we bear the likeness of the man from heaven.
I declare to you, brothers, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed—in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "Death has been swallowed up in victory."
"Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?"
The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

All of it spoke to my heart. All of it moved me to tears. All of it made me think about the man God created for me. All of it made me so grateful that he has a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. All of it made me rejoice that we don't have to worry about death. Christ gives us VICTORY over death! I love the verse that says, "we will not all sleep, but we will all be changed..." And I love the final verse that helped me to find peace with the very thing I feared the most. I put it in bold letters above, but I want us to read it again - Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

The Lord has called my husband to something that requires that he give up EVERYTHING and go to the place God has called him to go. The Lord is asking him daily to give himself fully to the work of the Lord, and His Word tells us that it is NOT in vain. He's asking that of me, too, and of all who believe in Him. We must stand firm and let NOTHING move us! We MUST give ourselves fully to the work of the Lord, and, if in that, we lose our life (physically) then we will know what it is to stand in the presence of Almighty God!

We will continue to have these tough conversations, but the sting has lessened by the power of God's Word and the promises therein.

Thank you for your Word, God. Thank you for your promises. Thank you that because of Jesus Christ and the sacrifice He made we can live in victory today and forevermore.

The Touch of His Hand

Early this morning my husband rolled over and moved his arm to the back of my pillow and, as it woke me, I put my hand in his. I'm finding these simple touches instantly bring me to this thought - how in the world am I going to live without him for so long?

What If...

This evening I picked up my book - Following God with All Your Heart, by Elizabeth George - and just had to giggle at God. If you haven't read my post from yesterday, you might want to read this first so the rest makes sense.

In this particular chapter of the book, speaking mainly about obedience, Elizabeth ended it with:

Imagine what the world would be like if...

Noah said, "I don't do boats."
David said, "I don't do Goliaths."
Mary said. "I don't do virgin births."
John the Baptist said, "I don't do baptisms."
Paul said, "I don't do letters."
Jesus said, "I don't do crosses!"

And what if Joshua said, "I don't cross Jordans."

I can't tell you how many times I've picked up this book to find that God just continues to speak on the same subject I was reflecting on, or read in my bible or talked to Him about. It's as if He rearranges the pages to continue the conversation.

I thought this little phrase at the beginning of the next chapter was pretty amazing too...very fitting for what we are experiencing.

If it is God's plan that we should march through a river,

or attack a walled town, or turn to fight an army,

we have simply to go forward.

He will make the mountains go away.

Rivers will dry up; walls will fall down;

armies shall be scattered.

F.B Meyer

From Ordinary to Extraordinary

One of the twins just asked me how long it has been since I've blogged...I found that a little funny! He heard me say I needed to blog this weekend, and then evidently noticed I haven't done it yet. The weekend's not over so I guess I better keep my word! haha...

I'm having a hard time with it being May already. Part of me wants it to be May because our son is coming to visit this month (in less than three weeks now!!), and the other part of me - the part of me that thinks about the deployment - doesn't.

I struggle with the thought of wishing it was the weekend all the time, too. I know I shouldn't wish my days away, but I long for them so I can spend more time with my husband...not to mention work is stressful and exhausting.

Today was the last time I'll hear my husband preach for over a year. I did good - I didn't cry, or even tear up! I prayed all the way to chapel that I wouldn't. Thank you, Lord!! His sermon title was "From ordinary to extraordinary" and was very fitting for all that is taking place for the people of our chapel.

Many of us are about to experience deployment and a year long separation due to it. Also, due to so many chaplains deploying this summer, they have decided to close our chapel and one other on our post. Our last service will be May 31. They said today that 60 chaplains from our post will deploy, leaving only 20 to minister to those not deploying. I'm sure those 20 will be extremely busy with rear detachment so I support that decision.

With all the changes taking place, we all have to make the choice - will we be ordinary or extraordinary? Will we step out in faith and do things for God that make a difference? Will we trust God and His will for our lives? It's not an easy thing to watch your spouse walk into harm's way and not feel overwhelmed. It's not easy to accept change sometimes, or not get down when things don't go the way you had planned, but God is with us and wants to work in and through us to accomplish extraordinary things for His kingdom.

I love Hebrews 11 and 12. After reading verses 35 - 40 of Chapter 11, I was touched by these words that came out of my husband's mouth - the world was not worthy of them, but the world NEEDED them. I knew God was speaking to my heart.

I don't know what it is exactly that the Lord would have me do in my husband's absence, but I've been asking Him to show me and prepare me. I know God has a purpose and plan for all things, and that it is His will for my husband to go and minister to our soldiers on foreign soil, and so I'm at peace about this. It doesn't mean I won't be extremely sad to see him go or not struggle. It just means I'm going to lean on the Lord and trust Him in this and seek to do the extraordinary for His glory while my husband seeks to do the same. And when the days set before us get tough and challenge our faith, we will remember those who have gone before us and fix our eyes on Jesus!

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrews 12: 1-3

Short & Sweet

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been praying for us during this time of preparation. I won't lie - it's not easy. Work is very tiring right now, as we're finishing up a project, and I want to spend as much time as I can with my husband, so I wish for the weekends, and then when I think about the fact that the weekend means it's one week closer to his deployment I feel bad for wishing the weekdays away.

I appreciate the prayers very much. God is good. We're strong in Him and continue to trust Him and His plans. My husband and I just continue to grow closer to the Lord and each other. I wouldn't trade some of the wonderful talks we've had over the last few months. God is faithful and I know He will meet every need in the weeks and months and years to come.

Thanks again! You all are a blessing!

Hello Again!

I know...it's been a long time! Even for someone who loves to write, there are certain times it's just hard to put into writing what my heart feels.

A little over a week ago, I was given a calendar during our FRG meeting that I didn't really think a whole lot about at the time, but the next day at work I was writing down all the days off my husband will have before he deploys and it hit me like a ton of bricks - I was holding three months in my hand (April, May and June)...the last of the time left before he would leave for ONE YEAR!

ONE WHOLE YEAR (minus two weeks of R & R!) without the love of my life, my best friend, my favorite person in the whole world...

Since that day, every night when I roll over and feel his body next to mine in the middle of the night, I feel the sadness come over me. Some nights I cry. Some nights I try to hold him close without waking him. Some nights I imagine that day when he'll have to walk away from us and wonder how much agony he will go through. Some nights I imagine what the day of his return will be like. Some nights I think about the unthinkable and ask God to bring him home safely to us. Some nights I simply ask the Lord to help me to be strong and help me fall back asleep.

A few times I've cried at random, weird moments. Like the moment we got in the car after walking through the camping section at a store yesterday. We just ran in to get a baseball cap for the twins and wandered that direction and BAM! it hits me...this summer won't be the same. Everyone else in the car was talking about baseball, since the boys had just found out they made the team, and I'm crying like a baby and trying to hide it. My husband mentions to me a lot how he wonders how much the twins will change in the year he is gone, especially now that they have braces. I know it makes him sad.

See why I haven't blogged lately...haha! When I type it all out I feel like I sound so down or something. I'm not though! I know the One who brings strength and encouragement and peace that passes all understanding. I certainly can't explain it any other way! I still smile. I still feel joy and peace even knowing it won't be easy. I still trust God with His plans for our lives, knowing this is His plan for my husband to minister to the soldiers that He places under his care. In fact, just this Friday, as I watched soldiers march on both sides of my car as I drove to work and they went about their weekly road march, I was filled with joy that he will be there for our country's brave men when they face difficult moments. I wouldn't want it any other way because I know it's the Lord's will.

A Short Sermon Clip

God is at Work!

God uses these videos to work on my heart. When I tell the Lord I'm not sure I'm ready to be without my husband for a year, all it takes is seeing something like this to bring me back around to surrendering my will to His (God's). Have you ever asked the question - what would our military be like without chaplains? I pray we never know!

The Old Rugged Cross - Sung by our Soldiers

I'm always thrilled to sit down with my husband and see pictures after he returns from the field, but this time he came home with video clips of one of his services!!

Recently, I've had several new women contact me through my blog whose husbands are considering the chaplaincy. I pray this video will give you a glimpse of the ministry he could have to the Soldiers of this country.